Gosh, until the end I thought that yoUOJ wrote this article. I believed all along that Trump would prevail. This was the ultimate V'nahafoch Hu of our day. Like Trump said, he could go shoot someone in broad daylight on 5th Avenue and still win. The God of the Hebrews is calling the shots. The fear is that we may be in store for a modern day Purim. As scary as that sounds, at least we know we will come out on top in the end.
Orthodox Jews love sexy shiksas. I even know one rabbi who prides himself that his wife doesn't look Jewish at all and cites Devarim 21:11 as his rationalization. So what's bad about dipping some foxy hookers in a mikvah water to help their poor "religious" boyfriends find solace in Judaism once again? As you would expect, for a little financial compensation, for little Chanukah gelt. There is an old anecdote: A Jew brings his dog to a rabbi and says, "I want my dog to be barmitzvahed!" "That's against the Torah, sheigetz! Gei in drerd arain!" shouts the rabbi (either Hershel Schechter or Haskel Lookstein). "But I already put aside one million dollars for the bar mitzvah!" cries the Jew. "So why didn't you tell me right away that your dog is an Yid! Of course, I'll get your dog barmitzvahed!" grovels the rabbi.
Well, she did visit the "Ohel" of the so-called "Rebbe Shlita" before the election. Apparently, it was Schneersohn's will that Trump was elected president.
Sure, UOJ, that lady in a dark jacket next to Donald Trump :)
ReplyDeleteאני לא רואה את הברכיים שלה!
Gosh, until the end I thought that yoUOJ wrote this article. I believed all along that Trump would prevail. This was the ultimate V'nahafoch Hu of our day. Like Trump said, he could go shoot someone in broad daylight on 5th Avenue and still win. The God of the Hebrews is calling the shots. The fear is that we may be in store for a modern day Purim. As scary as that sounds, at least we know we will come out on top in the end.
ReplyDeleteOrthodox Jews love sexy shiksas. I even know one rabbi who prides himself that his wife doesn't look Jewish at all and cites Devarim 21:11 as his rationalization. So what's bad about dipping some foxy hookers in a mikvah water to help their poor "religious" boyfriends find solace in Judaism once again? As you would expect, for a little financial compensation, for little Chanukah gelt. There is an old anecdote: A Jew brings his dog to a rabbi and says, "I want my dog to be barmitzvahed!" "That's against the Torah, sheigetz! Gei in drerd arain!" shouts the rabbi (either Hershel Schechter or Haskel Lookstein). "But I already put aside one million dollars for the bar mitzvah!" cries the Jew. "So why didn't you tell me right away that your dog is an Yid! Of course, I'll get your dog barmitzvahed!" grovels the rabbi.
ReplyDeleteWell, she did visit the "Ohel" of the so-called "Rebbe Shlita" before the election. Apparently, it was Schneersohn's will that Trump was elected president.
ReplyDeleteThe Lubavitcher Rebbe שליט"א in 2016: No reason to continue keeping commandments, the redemption has arrived. That took longer than we expected, folks...
ReplyDeleteNo, no. She didn't Daven to him. That's not why Yidden go to Rebbe's graves. They go their to invoke their zechusim in their prayers to Hashem.
ReplyDelete