A peek at next year's AA Fressers Convention - Master of Ceremonies - Marvin Schick Esq.
Hi -- My name is Marvin, and I'm an alcoholic!
Gathering responds - Hi Marvin!
I did not say a "recovering" alcoholic, because that word infers that I am cured. We are never cured; just like an idiot [see above photo with comic book in hand] can never be cured from their mental illness! It took me some time to admit that I'm sick as well as all of you here tonight, really sick. But it's a good start...my advice is to drink borscht instead - right in back of the room -- Avi Shafran will see to it that you get a double on the rocks. Now what's this I hear about kids in yeshiva being molested by their rebbes? Hey...Avi, did you spike my borscht?
Alcoholics Anonymous® Fressers is a fellowship of men and "others who have feet" [edited by ArtScroll] who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking and lying. There are no dues or fees for AA membership (there is a tax at the meat carving station); we are self-supporting through the good graces of the U.S. government contributions. AA Fressers is not allied with any really overly-weird sect like cannibalism, abomination denominations, politics [Vote for Jon Corzine in New Joisy], out of the closet homosexual organizations or institutions, certainly not Yeshiva University; does not wish to engage in any meaningful controversy or dialogue, neither endorses nor opposes [except one] any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholic fressers to achieve sobriety and truthfulness.
IS A.A. Fressers FOR YOU?
Only you can decide whether you want to give A.A. Fressers a try — whether you think it can help you. We who are in A.A.F. came because we finally gave up trying to control our drinking and lying. We still hated to admit that we could never drink and lie [and chew gum] safely at the same time. Then we heard from other A.A.F. members that we were sick. We thought so for years, and now we have UOJ confirming it! [He has not been wrong yet]
Be strong and make sure to return next year, to find out if any of our members have fallen off the borscht wagon; seeing for yourself is believing, no lashon hara would then be necessary.
Now a few words from Rabbi Lipa Margulies shlita who will lead the gathering in reciting the Tehillim.
This session sponsored by:
