Thursday, February 05, 2009

Call Me Crazy!

1- Working on Sunday - I kept the CC muted TV in my office on Bloomberg News not on the Superbowl channel. I hate "Steelers" and "Cardinals"!

2- I do not care what kind of car my neighbor drives.

3 - Fun for me is speed-reading 10-20 books on religion, history, science, philosophy.... at Barnes & Noble on a given Sunday with a cup of Starbucks!

4 - I told my sister that I don't care if she thinks me crazy because I put a picture up on UOJ. (She did say I'm better looking in person - I agree -- but she'd say anything to get me to take it down - she lives in Lakewood, whaddya expect?)

5 - I don't care what anyone thinks about me and never did!

6 - Blessed with a 170 IQ - I still say hello happily, and converse freely with immigrants that came across the Mexican border legally, that are in my employ, mow my lawn and clean my house -- on issues that are important to them! I always praise them warmly on a job well done and never fail to ask how their family is. Why? Because I genuinely care about their welfare!

7 - The more hate mail I get - the better I feel!

8 - I don't give a hoot about how many square feet of living space my neighbor has. The more dumpsters in front of his house for home expansion and renovations every year - the more pity I have for him!

9 - I never go to parties other than dropping my head in to my accountant's New Years party as a courtesy!

10 - I own 14 suits - I wear one a day (yeah - one at a time wise guys) and send them to the cleaners - 7 per week. I am very passionate in all my endeavors during the day and the suit I wear is generally soaked through with sweat and looks like I slept in it.

11 - Whenever I ask a question to someone I know - I know their answer before they respond!

15 - I never wear the same tie twice in a given month!

16 - I am extremely shy!

17 - Once I enter a shul - I never speak divrei chol!

18 - I completed Shas three times with all Rashi and most Tosefos (and some rishonim) without ArtScroll or Soncino (once before ArtScroll was born). I said a daf yomi for 3 years. I received a maggid shiur daf yomi plaque from Moshe Sherer, and threw it in the garbage upon receipt.

19 - In general, conversations with most people never last more than a few minutes. I find most people possessed with themselves and very boring! There are exceptions - not many!

20 - I hate the telephone! Cell phone conversations, at the max, (barring emergencies) last one minute!

21 - My S'micha, one of the signatories happens to be R' Arthur's uncle -- says I'm a baki b'kama v'kama sugyas b'Shas (gimmee a break I'm only 20), with b'kius and charifus in Gemora, Poskim, Pilpul and Halacha and another 300 words of praise and accomplishments in Torah and middos (embarrassing). {If they only knew what became of me}

22 - Attending weddings is an uncomfortable chore that I try to avoid. With the statistics of divorce (and misery) in the Jewish community increasing rapidly - chances are high that the poor parents throwing the wedding party will be paying for marriage counselling and ultimately and sadly in many cases, a rabbi that writes gittin. {This is what goes through my mind at the chupah - will this couple make it? - spoils everything - I don't care who the chazzan is}

23 - I remember over 1000 telephone numbers.

24 - I type with one finger! I play the piano with ten fingers - on Purim, I throw in a couple of toes!

25 - I sleep no more than 4 hours per night!

26 - I remember every license plate on every car I owned.

27 - I used to live in Brooklyn 11, New York - with an Evergreen phone number EV 7 - 7818. Then we moved to Brooklyn 13, New York - with a President phone number - PR 4- 4142 - private line 467-4336.

28 - I am very happy with my lot in life.

29 - I tell people "try to be happy 70% of your day."

30 - After my kids got married I told them "if you need money, lose my phone number." {Truth be told, they have been disrespectful to this request}

31 - Everything to me is black & white - no gray area.

32 - I'm either loved or hated - no pareve feelings towards me. (No kidding Margo)

That's all for now...folks!