Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The single most effective means of protecting your child is communication with your child.

Characteristics and Behavioral Indicators of a Pedophile

When most people imagine a child molester, they picture some ugly, old man in a trench coat coaxing children to come to him in exchange for some candy.  They don't picture Uncle Joe or Aunt Lorraine; the neighbor next door or the friendly parishioner; another family member or trusted co-worker.  They don't think of mom or dad, or in the case of single parents, their significant other.  This misconception has been effectively dispelled through information obtained in thousand of child sexual abuse investigations over the years.  Child molesters come from all walks of life and from all socioeconomic groups They can be male or female, rich or poor, employed or unemployed, religious or non-religious, highly educated or non-educated, or from any race.             

Through numerous case studies, the Department of Justice has developed characteristics and behavioral indicators of a pedophile.  They are as follows:

  1. Is most often an adult male.
  2. Is usually married.
  3. Works in a wide range of occupations, from unskilled laborer to corporate executive.
  4. Relates better to children than adults.
  5. Socializes with few adults unless they are pedophiles.
  6. Usually prefers children in a specific age group.
  7. Usually prefers either males or females, but may be bi-sexual.
  8. May seek employment or volunteer with programs involving children of the age of his preference.
  9. Pursues children for sexual purposes.
  10. Frequently photographs or collects photographs of his victims, either dressed, nude, or in sexually explicit acts.
  11. Collects child erotica and child-adult pornography.
  12. May possess and furnish narcotics to his victims to lower their inhibitions.
  13. Is usually intelligent enough to recognize that he has a personal problem and understand the severity of it.
  14. May go to great lengths to conceal his illegal activity.
  15. Often rationalizes his illicit activities, emphasizing his positive impact upon the victim and repressing feelings about the harm that he has done.
  16. Often portrays the child as the aggressor.  This usually occurs after the child realizes that by withholding "sexual favors" the child will obtain what he or she desires, such as new toys, clothing or trips.
  17. Talks about children in the same manner as one would talk about an adult lover or spouse.
  18. Often was a child molestation victim and frequently seeks out children at the age or stage of physical development at which he was molested.
  19. Often seeks out publications and organizations that support his sexual beliefs and practices.
  20. Usually corresponds with other pedophiles and exchanges child pornography and erotica as proof of involvement.
  21. Is usually non-violent and has few problems with the law (pedophiles are frequently respected community members).

The widespread misconception that child molestation consists solely of children being seized from the street and forcibly molested couldn't be further from the truth.  Although these incidents do occur, the vast majority of child molesters are adults who seduce children through subtle intimidation and persuasion and are known to the child.

The incestuous or interfamilial molester is usually an adult male (father, stepfather, grandfather or live-in boyfriend of the mother) who molests the child or children.  Although physical abuse may occur, the molestation is usually secretive and is accomplished through mental duress and threats - that the child would be removed from the family if he/she did not succumb to his wishes, that he/she would be blamed for hurting the family if the offender is arrested, or that a sibling would be sexually abused if the victim did not consent.  The molestation occurs over an extended period of time, occasionally into the victim's adulthood.  Through intimidation, the child is made to feel responsible for the molestation and for keeping the acts secret.  This secret is normally kept between the offender and the victim, or within the immediate family.

The stranger molester will use force or fear to molest children.  As the term implies, the child does not know the molester.  This type of molestation is usually reported promptly to the police because the trauma to the child is readily apparent.

The single-parent family is particularly vulnerable to the pedophile; the parent usually has a full-time job and is attempting to fulfill the role of both parents, as well as run the household.  In many cases the parent is unable to provide the psychological support the child needs.  These situations may contribute to the success of the child molester who can and will provide the caring attention, however superficial that may be lacking at home.  Of course, domestic problems in intact families also can make children vulnerable to the pedophile.  It should be noted as well, many pedophiles seek out mothers of single-parent families for the purpose of victimizing their children.

The single most effective means of protecting your child is communication with your child.  They have to feel comfortable discussing sensitive matters with you.  If they don't feel they can talk with you about their true feelings or that they will be "put down" for it, then you can't expect they will tell you when they are put in an uncomfortable situation by a child molester.

Teach your children that they should not be asked to touch anyone in the bathing suit areas of their body or allow anyone to touch them in those areas.  Teach them types of situations to avoid.  It's not good enough to tell a child to avoid strangers.  Most child molestation's are committed by someone known to or related to the child.