Friday, March 16, 2018

Great evening. Songs about goats #strange...

If Trump live tweets the Seder …

Donald Trump's sure to get an invitation to Kushner's Seder night.

Trump at the seder: #eatcementlosers
 Invited to Ivanka and Jared’s for Seder dinner. I’m all set to go. #happypassover

The failed New York Times says Passover starts today. FAKE NEWS #sad

 Just called Jared. It seems it actually is Passover today. #let'smakepassovergreat

Very excited and honored to be leading the Seder service tonight. It’s going to be a TERRIFIC evening, the BEST SEDER ever!

 Jared says I’m not quite Jewish enough to lead the service. He'll do a FANTASTIC job!

 Jews celebrate freedom from slavery. We all celebrate freedom from Obama!

 So the Egyptians made the Israelites build massive pyramids. AND the Jews had to pay for them. Smart work, pharoah!

Seems pharoah is bad guy. Horrible. Never liked him.

Service underway. It seems quite complicated and long. Someone pour me a large Scotch.

 You can’t even have ONE GLASS OF SINGLE MALT?!? #sad

 Jared serving Bread of Affliction. It's gonna be delicious.

We're eating some kind of big cracker with no flavor! #fakebread #passthejelly

 Big immigrant population don’t wanna work hard to make Egypt great again #sad

OK BIG NEWS. Serious pressure on Egypt to let the people go.

 Pharoah dithering. Cut a deal! Losing patience with Egypt here.

 Moses using alternative facts to play with the heads of the Egyptians. THERE ARE TEN PLAGUES

 Lucky Egyptians weren’t on Obamacare — they’d be sick and poor (if first born, dead and poor) #fail

I’m warming to this idea bigly. WATCH OUT KIM JONG UN #tenplaguesforKorea #boils #frogs #riversofblood

 Israelites migrating. Fortunately for them they are not headed for #USA. They still have to get over the Red Sea #badidea

 OK so the Red Sea has parted. LET’S BUILD THAT WALL FOLKS

Egyptian military total fail #drowned. Big lesson for NATO here

 We’re singing a song called Dayenu. It means we’ve had enough. Just like the American people have had enough of FAKE NEWS

Correction, it means ‘it would have been enough’. So had POTUS just got rid of evil Hillary, it would have been enough #dayenu

Had POTUS saved America from Muslims carrying bombs, it would have been enough #dayenu

 Had POTUS simply built the wall, it would have been enough #dayenu

Gonna have a word with Sean Spicer. #dayenu is going to be our next press conference

 Everyone is saying “Next Year in Jerusalem”. Let’s get that embassy built there.

 Next year in Scotland! Terrific country. The Scottish people love me so much #Let’sPlayGolf. #singlemalt

 Prayer books have been put away. Four glasses of wine drunk. Now the feast. Happy Passover to all my Jewish friends — even the Democrats

 Is Hillary Jewish? #alternativefacts

 They just brought an egg. And they poured salty water all over it. Someone get me a Chinese takeout — and let’s make the Chinese pay for it

 OK there’s a crisis developing. Afi Koman has gone missing. Let’s get together and start searching for him.

 I seem to remember that Afi was Israel’s Deputy Foreign Minister. Terrific guy. I hope his family are doing well and staying strong

 FAKE NEWS! Turns out Afi wasn’t the foreign minister, but a piece of matzah they hid. I led the search . Made sure Ivanka found it

 Everyone says we need to let in a guy called Elijah in. Has Elijah got a #greencard? Is he #muslim???

  They are putting wine in a glass for this guy. AND THEY ARE LEAVING THE DOOR OPEN #verysad

 We owe a debt to all of our immigrants but this is not the way we do business here anymore. No one gets a free pass. LET’S PUT AMERICA 1st!

 OK, Elijah is a dead prophet who comes back for a glass of wine. Who can blame him?

  Winding up. Great evening. Songs about goats #strange

  Looking forward to corned beef on rye at Trump Tower #signaturedish — hold the elevator!



Anonymous said...

Was that a picture of you in the latest Mishpacha? :-)

Paul Mendlowitz said...


Anonymous said...

The magazine profiles the others and lists you as one who fell out of touch. Ha.

Reminds me of the Chafetz Chaim's words regarding the map of Europe. Radin is very small on the general map, but on Hashem's map it is huge.

While you may not have made it in the musical world, no one can take away from you the fact that you took an issue which wasn't discussed and made it discussable.

And while I disagree with the way you mocked the gedolim, and hold you accountable for that, it is all of Klal Yisrael that have you to thank for your tenacious effort to stop abuse in yeshivas.

Paul Mendlowitz said...

I was 16 at the time of the photo...We had healthy recreational outlets in those days. We put out the first Pirchei record and hanging around the Pirchei was starting to take up too much of my time. There is life outside the Agudah:-)...Chances are that on Shabbosim and yomim tovim you are singing and dancing to the music I wrote. That's as far as I chose to take my musical career...I made it in my world and stay in touch with my chevra. (Very fond of the guys in the photo) Great memories!

Anonymous said...

If you could list a sampling of the songs you wrote, I would appreciate it. Thanks in advance.

Shiksa said...

Yoga Unorthodox in Hasidic Jewish Israel

Street Corner Crazy said...

The Yated recently profiled a BT from Pablo Escobar's neck of the woods in Cali, Columbia, who somehow made it to Torah Vodaas. Today he is the Kapiczynitzer chossid & soifer Stam in Boro Park, R' Aryeh Schechter.

He married a Biegeleisen:


SCHECHTER KAUFMAN, LEO married a bride named MIRIAM K. BIEGELEISEN in the year 1976 on license number 14603 issued in Manhattan


From the exact same Biegeleisen family that Belsky's sister married into.


Lakewood pedophile Gershon Biegeleisen is also from this same family.

He might even be the late Kolko surrogate's blood relative as a direct descendant of Berel Belsky & the Wilhelms.

Did the Belskys have a "Scheinberg problem" with their own familial molester they knew about which led both Belsky & RCPS to therefore protect the Kolkos to the hilt? Suddenly Belsky's behavior doesn't seem as bizarre. There was a method to the madness.

Old Torah Vodaas said...

The shidduch came about because R' Aryeh as a bochur was a ben bayis by Belsky.