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Sunday, October 10, 2010

"Over a period of ten years, she had been sexually abused by an adult family member!"


http://www.ou.org/shabbat_shalom/article/75085

October 03, 2010
Safety Net Failure: Preventing Child Abuse
By Joyce Schur


The saddest conversation I ever had took place a few years back with an out-of-town niece. She’d come to visit for a few precious days and at the end of our time together, she became quite pensive and withdrawn.

“You look like Atlas,” I suggested, “What is this weight of the world you seem to be carrying on such young shoulders?”

“I feel like Atlas,” she answered, “I made a difficult decision several weeks ago and I’m not sure it was the right choice”.

My niece, age 15 at the time, proceeded to tell me that her closest friend and classmate had come to her with a terrible confession: over a period of ten years, she had been sexually abused by an adult family member.

“She swore me to silence,” my niece went on, “but I realized it wasn’t a promise I could live with. I decided to speak with a responsible adult in my community, someone I respect and admire. Fortunately, this adult knew how to handle it. She reported it to a domestic crisis agency and the agency intervened. They contacted the family and reported that they’d been given reliable information from an anonymous source that their daughter was being abused.”

“The abuse stopped immediately,” my niece continued, “but the family has been torn apart as a result of trying to deal with it. I don’t know if I did the right thing. Do you think I did the right thing?”

“You did an incredibly brave thing,” I answered.

“But at what cost?” my niece responded.

“There are professional counselors who can give you a complete answer,” I suggested, “But one thing you ought to understand is this; it’s entirely likely that your friend was not the only victim involved in the past ten years. You’ve not only saved your friend, you’ve quite possibly saved others as well.”

But this was not the saddest part of our conversation. The saddest part came when I asked my niece why she had not chosen to turn to her parents or teachers. Her response was revealing.

“I didn’t know if the situation would have been believed. I get the feeling that most people in my community don’t think such things happen in good Orthodox Jewish families.”

With those words, my niece hinted at the gaping hole in the safety net of parenting that typically results when we teach our children about “stranger danger” and appropriate physical boundaries. What we neglect to reinforce is the idea that danger doesn’t always present itself in the form of strangers. The insidious nature of child abuse is this: trust is essential to the crime. According to national statistics, 90% of child sexual abuse victims know the perpetrator in some way; 68% are abused by family members.

In a long overdue and unprecedented attempt to address this problem, a broad range of community based organizations are coalescing to fight child abuse and create safety and protection for children by declaring October 17 -24 “National Jewish Child Abuse Prevention Week”. To promote National Week, The Jewish Board of Advocates (JBAC) is joined by the Orthodox Union and other co-sponsors including: the Rabbinical Council of America (RCA), the Rabbinical Alliance of America (Iggud HaRabbonim), the Jewish Institute Supporting an Abuse-Free Environment (JSafe), the Chicago Rabbinical Council (CRC) and Associated Talmud Torah (ATT) of Chicago.

On Sunday, October 17th, Chicago will be hosting the initial seminar, “Protecting our Children from Molesters” with speakers scheduled to address the following issues:

- awareness of the incidents of molestation and their impact on individuals/community
- how to better recognize and report knowledge of such incidents
- first hand survivor accounts and what communities/parents need to do to support victims of abuse

To learn more or for additional information and resources, please visit www.jewishadvocates.org

17 comments:

Far Rockaway said...

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2009/08/19/2009-08-19_queens_accountant_faces_kiddie_porn_rap.html

An accountant who works at a major Manhattan firm is facing up to seven years for kiddie porn, Queens prosecutors said.

Aron Sotnikoff was slapped with 54 counts of promoting sexual performance by a child and 54 counts of possessing a sexual performance by a child. Sotnikoff, 28 who works as an audit manager at Rosen Seymour Shapss Martin & Company, was arraigned Monday night in Queens and freed on $20,000 bail, authorities said.

"When all the facts come out, I believe he will be completely exonerated," said his attorney, Jonathan Kaye.

Prosecutors said a tip to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children led to the Far Rockaway man's arrest

http://criminaljustice.state.ny.us/SomsSUBDirectory/offenderDetails.jsp?offenderid=33294

222 BEACH 11TH ST, 1ST FL
FAR ROCKAWAY Queens New York 11691

Yona Weinberg said...

http://criminaljustice.state.ny.us/SomsSUBDirectory/offenderDetails.jsp?offenderid=32336

Mug shot on sex offender registry

Shimon Benisty said...

http://criminaljustice.state.ny.us/SomsSUBDirectory/offenderDetails.jsp?offenderid=33135

Violent pedophile convicted of assaulting 2 young girls.

1615 47th St in Boro Park.

Check out the big payos.

Anonymous said...

Why did Fox News hire this putz?

Acclaimed Fox 5 reporter Charles Leaf was suspended Friday after he was accused of molesting a 4-year-girl inside his New Jersey home.

The 40-year-old Leaf was arrested Thursday at his Wyckoff home on charges of aggravated sexual assault on a minor and endangering the welfare of children, authorities said.

"Fox 5 management is aware of the matter and that Charles Leaf has been suspended pending further investigation," said a station spokeswoman.

The married father of two is being held at the Bergen County Jail on $250,000 bail. His arraignment is slated for Nov. 4.

It's not the first time Leaf's conduct has become the subject of unsavory headlines.

In November 1999, Leaf, then a reporter in Mobile, Ala., was sued by a local councilwoman who alleged that the newsman attacked her while trying to interview her for a story.

Frela Wojciechowski said in the suit that Leaf pursued her to her car after a meeting and slammed the door on her arms and legs when she refused to talk.

Leaf abruptly left the station, WPMI. The suit was later settled, and no criminal charges were filed.

The Vaad to expose the Queens Vaad said...

http://thename.org/index2.php?option=com_docman&task=doc_view&gid=135&Itemid=26

It was not on the official itinerary but a medical professional who was at this week's annual conference of the National Association of Medical Examiners reports that the Agudah was given an 11th hour slot to make a presentation. So what do they squander the opportunity on? They introduce the Queens Vaad's Elchonon Zohn and his money making scam called National Association of Chevrah Kadisha which recruits Conservative chevrahs not doing taharos according to halacha.

And no word if the Queens Vaad ever plans on listening to Maran Rav Elyashev shlita to restore the graves of yesomim that they ripped up with Ohel's David Jacobson to resell for millions of dollars profit.

Anonymous said...

Here it is:

Babylonian Talmud: Tractate Kethuboth Folio 11a-b

MISHNAH. WHEN A GROWN-UP MAN47 HAS HAD SEXUAL INTERCOURSE WITH48 A LITTLE GIRL, OR WHEN A SMALL BOY HAS INTERCOURSE WITH A GROWN-UP WOMAN, OR [WHEN A GIRL WAS ACCIDENTALLY] INJURED BY A PIECE OF WOOD — [IN ALL THESE CASES] THEIR KETHUBAH IS TWO HUNDRED [ZUZ]; SO ACCORDING TO R. MEIR. BUT THE SAGES SAY: A GIRL WHO WAS INJURED ACCIDENTALLY BY A PIECE OF WOOD — HER KETHUBAH IS A MANEH. A VIRGIN, WHO WAS A WIDOW, A DIVORCEE, OR A HALUZAH FROM MARRIAGE — HER KETHUBAH IS A MANEH....

Read the rest of the good stuff here:

http://halakhah.com/kethuboth/kethuboth_11.html

You should study more too... ;)

UOJ Gets Results said...

Officials: Hungarian sludge will fall

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101010/ap_on_re_eu/eu_hungary_sludge_flood

Anonymous said...

Whats your take on the election? Will the Tea Party pull off another 100 seats for the Republicans????

I hope so.......

Anonymous said...

what ever happened with the lakewood story?

OU Crony Watch said...

http://atlasshrugs2000.typepad.com/atlas_shrugs/2010/10/m-m-m-m-m-muslim-brotherhood-good.html

The Campbell's Soup company, after dropping the OU on their soups, are now picking up a Muslim Halal certification from the Hamas linked ISNA group.

The OU continues to certify Campbell's V8 vegetable juices and Pepperidge Farm brands.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Boycott-Campbell-Soup/131754940208808?ref=nf&v=wall

Over 3000 people have so far joined a Facebook page to boycott all Campbell's products for supporting Hamas.

Leopold Margulies said...

Sheker vechuzev! Is dis UOJ stirring up dreck again?

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/12/world/europe/12hungary.html

BUDAPEST — The managing director of the company whose reservoir unleashed a lethal torrent of red sludge on three villages last week has been arrested, the Hungarian prime minister said Monday, castigating the company for corporate greed before Parliament.

Archie Bunker said...

Only the NY Times and Shmarya would say "believe it or not"

http://economix.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/09/29/jail-and-jobs/

Incarceration rates in the United States have risen sharply since 1980, especially for young black men. Today more than one in three young black men without a high school diploma is currently behind bars.

Believe it or not, young black men who dropped out of high school are more likely to be incarcerated than employed.

Archie Bunker said...

I hope this doesn't give Shmarya a heart attack

http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3961279,00.html

Jewish billionaire Gennady Bogolyubov celebrates daughter's birth by granting $500 each to Chabad's 4,000 representatives worldwide

Gumshoe said...

Do UOJ & friends have any additional information on the following?

The sefer from the toain in Israel (Weingarten?) about the real
history of Agudah. He documents quite a bit. I didn't read it (its in Ivrit and I don't think anyone carries it here in the US).

Agudah was very unhappy with his documented version.

R' Tuvia Goldstein (after they asked him not to mention something in a speech he was about to say on Shabbos at an Agudah fresser convention, he had spoken it over with R' Moshe and R' Moshe was maskim he should speak about the topic). He said afterwards that's the last time I'm speaking at an Agudah convention.

Paul Mendlowitz said...

WASHINGTON (AP) Fed Minutes: Program to buy more government debt to bolster the economy dominated discussions.

*

If Madoff got 150 years, Bernanke should get 1000!

Paul Mendlowitz said...

Here's a hint Gumshoe.

In the early 1950's, Menachem Porush the titular head of the national Agudath Israel both here and in Israel, had opened the Agudath Israel Bank.

It was capitalized with approximately $100 million dollars.
The money came from all over the world. A few short years later, there were accusations against Porush that millions of dollars could not be accounted for.

After the police got involved, the bank got shut down and the investigation came to an abrupt halt!

In the early 1960's the Merkaz Hotel in Jerusalem was built for CASH. It was owned by Porush, who was a poor political slob up until then.

He brokered deals between the politicians and was involved deeply with Bernard Bergman in the smuggling of Sephardic kids out of the country - for big bucks - to families in America!

And then he purchased for CASH, every piece of property he could get his hands on in Israel, (and some claim in the U.S.A.)...

Mike Tress was well aware of this as well as Moshe Sherer (As well as Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky zt"l).

Childrens Town Israel, while it is responsible for much good, was purchased with "Porush's" money, and today belongs to the Porush family exclusuvely.

Anonymous said...

the book is called "mikatovitz ad hey b'iyar" its written by tzvi weinman and is availible sometimes at beigeleisen and some stores in lakewood. great book.